October 16, 2021

New York Hookups

Best guide for meeting hotties in NY!

dan and phil being gay

Kissing

I-I dropped out of college to become a full-time internet homo… erm-did I ju-fucking-uh P: Oh you’re inside my ball again D: Already freaking out inside each other *Phil chuckles* Had a random text from Marcus Butler Like- quite late at night, let me just see what it says He texted me saying: With a bunch of sexually suggestive emojis Now- for about 30 seconds, really got my hopes up (slowed down) Really got my hopes up Who’s your man crush? P: My man crush- D: Evan Peters P: I knew you were going to say Evan Peters! *audience cheers* P: My man crush-erm- Michael Cera Oh nice-! *audience screams* That’s a good one! D:*laughs* Nice choice! P: Thanks! D: That was just- P: John has the beautiful eyes of all- D: John has the most beautiful eyes of anybody, he has such a deep soul P: He does!

D: You could get lost in John’s eyes, guys, seriously P: You could. D: We all know Tyler’s lips quite well. P: Yes. You can watch Free! and learn about swimming! …as I’m sure everyone watches it for. …the swimming.

Wow! He’s kissing his- Felix? Wow! I mean- He’s kind of joking about this kissing the muscles at the star- OK. Er-woohoo!

Gonna come back to this later! Why is he wearing a vest? That’s not legal. *video in the background* I’ll watch that by myself at 2P-uh-2AM, tonight and be kind of impressed and scared at the same time I’ve already given away other reason why I’m gonna be watching it at 2AM tonight-um C: Patting became my thing- D: Conner-Conner’s a good patter, isn’t he? C: I should be a dad, (P: Yeah) pat babies and stuff D: Daddy Next question!https://www.bbb.org/ca/bc/vancouver/profile/dating-services/plentyoffish-media-inc-0037-1245924 Is Phil Team Edward or Team Jacob?

P: Oh! D: Go! P: Edward! *audience groans* P: Edward’s so much cooler! D: I thought you like animals!

P: I like animals! D: And Taylor Lautner taking his t-shirt off P: But I like- *audience screams, Dan laughs victoriously* P: I just think, overall, vampires are cooler D: Okay, okay *raspberry noise* D: And Liam’s taller than me P: Is he?! D: Liam, he’s like- he’s big P: He’s a big guy D: I don’t what they say his height is, bigger than Dan P: Wow! D: Putting it out there. So I was like: Senpai!

P: Senpai! D: Daddy, hello And of course, the one nomination that we definitely know at the moment is Jack Garratt D: Mmhm, of course, great choice And he is amazing, (D: Amazing) I have never seen him perform live (P: Yeah), but I’ve heard him perform live P: He’s a very pretty guy, isn’t he? Yeah, he is-!

D: -have to leave or listen to it on laptop headphones, I want to be like: *inhales* light a candle… sit like this, and go “Enter me, Troye! Erm- which is the beginning of like 5 situations that I daydream about regularly- that’s not what we’re talking about now Who is Dan’s biggest celebrity crush? Turn boards!

D & P: Jennifer Lawrence or Evan- *audience screams* P: What?! Ooooh! P: I got it right! *Dan laughs* D: Oh my- I-I can’t believe you got both! P: I-I have to get-like- 20 extra points for getting both D: Wait-wait-wait-okay-wait-wait-wait-!

I-I dropped out of college to become a full-time internet homo… erm-did I ju-fucking-uh P: Oh you’re inside my ball again D: Already freaking out inside each other *Phil chuckles* Had a random text from Marcus Butler Like- quite late at night, let me just see what it says He texted me saying: With a bunch of sexually suggestive emojis Now- for about 30 seconds, really got my hopes up (slowed down) Really got my hopes up Who’s your man crush? P: My man crush- D: Evan Peters P: I knew you were going to say Evan Peters! *audience cheers* P: My man crush-erm- Michael Cera Oh nice-! *audience screams* That’s a good one! D:*laughs* Nice choice! P: Thanks! D: That was just- P: John has the beautiful eyes of all- D: John has the most beautiful eyes of anybody, he has such a deep soul P: He does!

Kissing

D: You could get lost in John’s eyes, guys, seriously P: You could. D: We all know Tyler’s lips quite well. P: Yes. You can watch Free! and learn about swimming! …as I’m sure everyone watches it for. …the swimming.

Wow! He’s kissing his- Felix? Wow! I mean- He’s kind of joking about this kissing the muscles at the star- OK. Er-woohoo!

Gonna come back to this later! Why is he wearing a vest? That’s not legal. *video in the background* I’ll watch that by myself at 2P-uh-2AM, tonight and be kind of impressed and scared at the same time I’ve already given away other reason why I’m gonna be watching it at 2AM tonight-um C: Patting became my thing- D: Conner-Conner’s a good patter, isn’t he? C: I should be a dad, (P: Yeah) pat babies and stuff D: Daddy Next question! Is Phil Team Edward or Team Jacob?

P: Oh! D: Go! P: Edward! *audience groans* P: Edward’s so much cooler! D: I thought you like animals!

P: I like animals! D: And Taylor Lautner taking his t-shirt off P: But I like- *audience screams, Dan laughs victoriously* P: I just think, overall, vampires are cooler D: Okay, okay *raspberry noise* D: And Liam’s taller than me P: Is he?! D: Liam, he’s like- he’s big P: He’s a big guy D: I don’t what they say his height is, bigger than Dan P: Wow! D: Putting it out there. So I was like: Senpai!

P: Senpai! D: Daddy, hello And of course, the one nomination that we definitely know at the moment is Jack Garratt D: Mmhm, of course, great choice And he is amazing, (D: Amazing) I have never seen him perform live (P: Yeah), but I’ve heard him perform live P: He’s a very pretty guy, isn’t he? Yeah, he is-!

D: -have to leave or listen to it on laptop headphones, I want to be like: *inhales* light a candle… sit like this, and go “Enter me, Troye! Erm- which is the beginning of like 5 situations that I daydream about regularly- that’s not what we’re talking about now Who is Dan’s biggest celebrity crush? Turn boards!

D & P: Jennifer Lawrence or Evan- *audience screams* P: What?! Ooooh! P: I got it right! *Dan laughs* D: Oh my- I-I can’t believe you got both! P: I-I have to get-like- 20 extra points for getting both D: Wait-wait-wait-okay-wait-wait-wait-!

D: We actually put 2 down and you got the same people?! P: That’s scary D: That’s impressive… wow. Dan, are you watching my butt?

D: I am watching both of your butts, intensely. D: This is Romeo and Juliet, to be honest, although.. she was incredible in that as was young Leo Who I also wouldn’t mind marrying. P: *reading* D: Anything you say, Willow P: *offscreen, reading* P: -actually scared of that. D: It-it- seriously, but it’s great, love Evan Peters’ character, (P: Good character)yes, excited by that D: I’m like (P: Lady Gaga’s in it as well) I’m glad that he’s not just kind of like-erm D: (P: Teen) He’s not the angsty-whilst, obviously, *whooshing noise* I can watch the other seasons if I need a bit of that back in my life P: If you need a bit of Evan- back in D: Need a bit of- of Evan back in my life but you know, not complaining, I’d be his victim *Phil chuckles* D: That’s like my favourite thing on the internet, what was going through Niall’s mind when he met me. D: I’m not gonna lie, guys, there was a lot of erotic eye contact D: -I ship you with Sid from Skins… not complaining Mysterious voice, offscreen: Power will be restored shortly.

When you crawl through- D: Now, you might not be into sports, that’s okay, neither am I- D: But, you might be into cute boys, in speedos D: I’ll touch you when I please– *Phil gives a startled laugh* P: *deep* Probably. P: Come on, come on, this is the magic Christmas video about Akinator, if you say-