October 22, 2020

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What To Do If Your Boyfriend Cheats

Dating

Thanks for joining us today. We are going to talk about, “What to do if your boyfriend cheats on you?” Today we’re going to talk about what to do if your boyfriend cheats on you. Now, I work at a residential treatment center for teen girls.

So, this oftentimes is a topic of discussion of boyfriends that cheat in their relationships. So, let’s talk about what that means. And again, we’re going to go back to the basics today. Because this YouTube channel is all about principle-based living. So, what are the principles upon or which affect or influence this situation or circumstance?

Well, let’s talk about what is cheating because often times, we… In dating relationships you know, we think that cheating is anytime a person that we’re dating is involved with anyone else. It could be that you know we don’t do dating so much anymore but it could be thought of that, “If I’m dating somebody and then they date somebody else, they’re cheating on me.” Well, let’s talk specifically about a committed relationship.

So, you’re with a guy and you have decided that the two of you are going to be exclusive and committed to each other and you’re not going to see or be interested in anyone else. So, that’s the setting, that’s the situation. So, you’ve made that decision.

You’re in that kind of a relationship and then you find out that your boyfriend hooks up with another girl. So, what does that mean? So remember, in and of itself, that’s an event or that’s a circumstance that’s something that happens and in and of itself, it means nothing.https://datetoluv.com/facebook-dating-app-guide/ Your boyfriend cheated. He got with another person.

And the decision was that you guys were going to be committed to each other. He violated that agreement. What does it mean? Again, it means nothing until you attach meaning to it. So, think about it.

What could it mean? Well, it could mean that you just found out the truth about the guy that you were dating. And as a result, you no longer want to be in a relationship with him.

So, if I think about it that way, is it actually a good thing that he cheated? So, finding that out could actually be a good thing. Because now you know what kind of a person he really is and then you can ask yourself, “Is that the kind of a person that I want to be in a relationship with?” And it may be the answer to that is, “No.” So, with that information, it helps me make future decisions. And as a result of my boyfriend cheating on me, I now know, “I don’t want to be in a relationship with him anymore.” So, it frees me up to make a new decision moving forward.

So, what else could it mean? So again, if we look at this situation, it can mean really only two different things. It can tell me about the person that I’m in the relationship with, tells me about who that person is. It can also tell me some things about me.

Either way, it’s information. It’s information that we can use to inform us to make different or better decisions moving forward in the future. So again, if I look at it as something about the other person… Again, it helps me make a decision about what kind of people am i attracted to. Why is it or what is it that maybe I didn’t see about this person early on?

So, maybe there were some red flags in the relationship. But I chose to ignore those red flags. Maybe that person really didn’t treat me the way that I wanted to be treated. But I put up with it because I get my value externally. And I felt like in order for me to be okay, that I needed to stay in this relationship.

Even though there were thoughts and feelings at times that maybe this wasn’t the best relationship to be in. But I just wanted to ignore those things. So again, that’s information that tells me things about myself. What are the thoughts and beliefs that I have about me that drive my behavior and influence the people that I associate with?

And the people that I get into relationships with? The other thing that I can learn from this experience is that it can inform me or give me information about myself. So, I’m not responsible for my partner for my boyfriend cheating on me. He’s the one that’s responsible for that behavior.

Thanks for joining us today. We are going to talk about, “What to do if your boyfriend cheats on you?” Today we’re going to talk about what to do if your boyfriend cheats on you. Now, I work at a residential treatment center for teen girls.

So, this oftentimes is a topic of discussion of boyfriends that cheat in their relationships. So, let’s talk about what that means. And again, we’re going to go back to the basics today. Because this YouTube channel is all about principle-based living. So, what are the principles upon or which affect or influence this situation or circumstance?

Well, let’s talk about what is cheating because often times, we… In dating relationships you know, we think that cheating is anytime a person that we’re dating is involved with anyone else. It could be that you know we don’t do dating so much anymore but it could be thought of that, “If I’m dating somebody and then they date somebody else, they’re cheating on me.” Well, let’s talk specifically about a committed relationship.

So, you’re with a guy and you have decided that the two of you are going to be exclusive and committed to each other and you’re not going to see or be interested in anyone else. So, that’s the setting, that’s the situation. So, you’ve made that decision.

You’re in that kind of a relationship and then you find out that your boyfriend hooks up with another girl. So, what does that mean? So remember, in and of itself, that’s an event or that’s a circumstance that’s something that happens and in and of itself, it means nothing. Your boyfriend cheated. He got with another person.

in a Relationship

And the decision was that you guys were going to be committed to each other. He violated that agreement. What does it mean? Again, it means nothing until you attach meaning to it. So, think about it.

What could it mean? Well, it could mean that you just found out the truth about the guy that you were dating. And as a result, you no longer want to be in a relationship with him.

So, if I think about it that way, is it actually a good thing that he cheated? So, finding that out could actually be a good thing. Because now you know what kind of a person he really is and then you can ask yourself, “Is that the kind of a person that I want to be in a relationship with?” And it may be the answer to that is, “No.” So, with that information, it helps me make future decisions. And as a result of my boyfriend cheating on me, I now know, “I don’t want to be in a relationship with him anymore.” So, it frees me up to make a new decision moving forward.

So, what else could it mean? So again, if we look at this situation, it can mean really only two different things. It can tell me about the person that I’m in the relationship with, tells me about who that person is. It can also tell me some things about me.

Either way, it’s information. It’s information that we can use to inform us to make different or better decisions moving forward in the future. So again, if I look at it as something about the other person… Again, it helps me make a decision about what kind of people am i attracted to. Why is it or what is it that maybe I didn’t see about this person early on?

So, maybe there were some red flags in the relationship. But I chose to ignore those red flags. Maybe that person really didn’t treat me the way that I wanted to be treated. But I put up with it because I get my value externally. And I felt like in order for me to be okay, that I needed to stay in this relationship.

Even though there were thoughts and feelings at times that maybe this wasn’t the best relationship to be in. But I just wanted to ignore those things. So again, that’s information that tells me things about myself. What are the thoughts and beliefs that I have about me that drive my behavior and influence the people that I associate with?

And the people that I get into relationships with? The other thing that I can learn from this experience is that it can inform me or give me information about myself. So, I’m not responsible for my partner for my boyfriend cheating on me. He’s the one that’s responsible for that behavior.

But I’m responsible for me and my behavior. I know that I don’t control him. But I do control me. Now, there might be things that I do or that I did in that relationship with this person. That influenced this person to behave the way that they behaved.

It may be that I have some habits or some beliefs or some patterns that push other people away. Maybe there were things that I did to send a message to my partner that I don’t feel very good about myself. Maybe I don’t value myself.

Think about this. Maybe I’m really jealous. And every time you know, I noticed my boyfriend looking at another female, I felt fear because of that.

And I brought attention to that situation. I may have unintentionally influenced him to see me the same way that I see myself. That I don’t value myself and that I think other people are prettier than me, more attractive than me, more intelligent than me, more successful than me.

Whatever that is. And so, I’m sending the message that I have less value than other people do. And so, I want to look at myself and how I see myself.

Do I value myself? How do I treat myself? Am I able to set healthy boundaries about what I will accept and what I won’t accept in my life? So, the main thing that I would hope that you would get from this video today is to recognize that if you have a boyfriend that cheats on you in your relationship, all that really is is information to you to help you learn from and to make better decisions and choices moving forward in your life.

It doesn’t mean that you’re not an okay person. It may mean that you are an okay person and that you’ve just now recognized it it’s the other person that has problems. And so this is a good thing.

I can end that relationship and move on and find a relationship that is more healthy or more beneficial to me. Or it may be that there are some things that I can learn from this experience that I can learn about myself that I can then make changes in my thoughts and beliefs and how I see myself. Which will help me with future relationships that I create. And in becoming a different person so that I begin to attract different types of people into my life.

To ultimately create the relationships that I want to have that will bring me true happiness in my relationships and in my life. Thanks for joining us today. Hopefully this information, you found useful and to help you in your life if you have experienced a situation where your boyfriend is cheated on you. If you find this information helpful, go ahead and subscribe to our channel.

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